Today...

Today is a difficult day for me. One year ago today, at around 3 PM, the man who has acted as my unofficially adopted spiritual dad, passed away after a 14 year battle with ALS.

I miss him more than words can say. I wish there was something I could do to make the pain lessen. Over the past year, things have become a little easier. But it still hurts. A lot. I know it probably will for the rest of my life.

Today I am sad, but I'm also thankful that this man found it worth his while to know me, to care for me, and to be a part of my life.

It's also All Saints Day. Papa chose this day to have his ventilator turned off on purpose. He chose the time for a purpose as well. It's what we Catholics call a Holy Day of Obligation. So I will be going to Mass with a friend this evening.

My physical health has taken a toll in the past week, and I'm not sure if it's all grief or what. I am so sad today, and I'm going to allow myself to be sad today. But just for today.

Papa, I miss you so much. And I love you a ton. You mean the world to me. Please be with me today, and all of the other people that love you. You mean so much to so many people!

In Loving Memory of "Papa" Joe Winter

December 21, 1960 to November 1, 2010